Russell Media - Laurie

I'm reading Donald Miller's new book A Million Miles in a Thousand Years. It's a great book and I'm having a hard time putting it down. I have so many other "productive" things I need to do with my day. But then again it's opening my eyes to so many things that it may be a constructive to sit down, read the book and focus on what God is showing me through it.

Year's ago Donald wrote the book Blue Like Jazz, a book with well-written essays on his life. After the book's success, he was approached by two guys from Nashville to make the book into a movie. However, as with any book being made into a movie, it was necessary to tweak Don's life and give it a plot that would draw in the viewer. So, Don, the producer and cinematographer sat down and began editing Don's life in order to make it more "movie-worthy" - in other words…less boring. A Million Miles in a Thousand Years is about the lessons he learned during this process on how to live a "story" that is worth telling and not just go through the motions of life.

The book is a great read. Don continues to reign as a master of story telling. Part of me wonders how he continually comes across the interesting characters he has in his books? Is  it the people he meets or is it his ability to listen to and observe those he's around?

So…if you are looking for a good read or are still purchasing Valentine gifts for family and friends, consider Don Miller's A Million Miles in a Thousand Years. I highly recommend it.

Marcus Buckingham’s new book, Find Your Strongest Life: What the Happiest and Most Successful Women Do Differently lists some startling insight on the happiness of women and men. It has really stumped me.

Over the past 30 plus years various studies have quizzed men and women on their general state of happiness. They’ve questioned people from different races, economic status, marital status, education, etc. The findings of these surveys stated that women are less happy today than they were 40 years ago. Over 1.3 million people were questioned with the same results from the USA and other developed countries around the world. (pp17-19)

Another finding from one of the studies was that as women age they are less happy versus men who grow happier with age. The age 49 is the average intersection where men become happier and women become less and less happy with their lives.

Why is this? Women now have a multitude of choices. We live in an age where we can stay at home or compete in the workforce. We’re able to achieve highest levels of education. Many companies are even making it easier for women to work and care for their kids. If anything it seems we would be happier.

Can anyone relate to this? Women, those of us who are in our forties, are you becoming less happy with life? Men, do you sense this in your relationship with your wife?

If so, does anyone have any insight why in the age of freedom are most women less happy with life as we age?

Here is a random thought I had…perhaps the new earnings and status have allowed us to obtain things sooner and with less effort. What we use to work hard to own or become can be ours in little time.

Buckingham mentions the problem with choices. Not only do we have to measure up in our home life but now in our work, social, education, etc. I found that to be a good point.

Let me know what you think. I’m still trying to figure it out.

Does anyone out there feel less happy now than when they were younger? Any thoughts on why women are on the downward slide when it comes to happiness? Do any men feel the same way?

This past June our family was geared up to travel around town to watch the Ironman 70.3 Boise triathlon. The kids were eager to watch the cycling so we picked a spot that wasn’t too far from our house.

As we pulled to our destination I noticed bright orange vests directing traffic. The race officials had arranged for seasoned road crews to man the roads for the race. At first I wondered why they didn’t save some money and have volunteers man the streets. It didn’t take long for me to figure out why.

We parked our car and I walked over to the man with the sign and asked him if he had heard how long it would be until the cyclists would arrive. He gave me a toothless grin and said, “About fifteen minutes.”

Fifteen minutes turned into fifty and we were on a busy street and traffic was still running. Our friend with the bright orange vest was blocking off 2 lanes of traffic and a side street. This had slowed traffic and prevented some motorists from easily entering their neighborhood. The kids and I were bit bored as we waited for the triathletes so we spent most of our time watching our orange-vested friend work.

We were surprised by what we saw and heard. Time and again we heard motorists yell derogatory phrases at our orange-vested friend, “You should be fixing the highway instead of making our lives miserable!” And of course there were the hand gestures that were always over-dramatized.

My six-year-old daughter watched wide-eyed and asked why everyone was yelling at him to which our eight-year-old son added, “I know, they are being so mean and he’s done nothing wrong! He’s just doing his job.”

I continued to watch and noticed he never answered the harsh words or gave mocked hand gestures in return. He continued to work but the toothless grin was replaced with a look of defeat. Like my son had said, he was just doing his job and in doing so, he instilled the safety of the triathletes and spectators that day.

My heart hurt, for like many of the motorists, I had judged him based upon his physical appearance. I didn’t verbally degrade him but had initially judged him in my mind.

I learned a lot that day from the actions of the motorists and the innocent observations of my children. Jesus told us that what we do to the least of his children, we’re doing it unto Him. Our orange-vested friend turned his cheek many times that day. My guess is that Jesus was proud of one that day but hurt by many…me included.

A road crew’s sign has two words on it, “slow” and “stop”. Reflect today of the ways that our words and actions may cause others pain. If we are on the receiving end let’s not be brought down to the level of those who hurt us. Slow down, stop and think before act and react. Of course, sometimes the best thing to due is to turn the other cheek.

The other day I was at the local pet store stocking up on dog food for our two black labs, Louie and Gracie. It had been a while since I bought them a treat so I went in search of their favorite bone. I was excited when I found a package of two bones, the same size and almost identical shape. It was perfect.

Once home, I began unloading the “goods.” Louie and Gracie, who can read by the way, (Well…maybe it’s not truly reading but they know the difference between a clothing store and a pet store bag.) followed me into the kitchen, sat at attention with raised ears and waited for me expectantly, as if saying, “Okay mom, what did you get us today?! Go ahead, hand it over!”

I opened the bones and gave each dog their own bone. They then, overjoyed, took their bone and began gnawing away for about one minute.

It was then Louie decided he wanted to check out Gracie’s bone, you know to make sure that it wasn’t any better than his. After sniffing it, he decided he wanted to keep hers. Gracie, thrown off a bit, got up and went over to Louie’s original bone. She began chewing away on it. Louie then decided maybe his first bone was better and went to retrieve it. Gracie then decided it was her bone. Agh!

This went on and on for about 5 minutes. Finally, Gracie went outside with one of the bones, Louie followed and the same process continued outdoors for I don’t know how long. (By the way, both bones are presently missing!)

I was so frustrated watching the bone-snatching escapade. Neither one of them could enjoy their bones because they were so fixated on the fact that the other one possibly had a better bone.

I hate to say it but I can relate to my dogs. Often I find myself longing for what someone else has even though God has already given me something just as good or even better for my life.

God gives to us for our enjoyment. How many times are we tricked into thinking it’s not good enough? Are you like me and can relate to my dogs by thinking others have the better bones—with better manners of course! :)

Mark often complains of our house being a zoo. Not because it’s chaotic, loud and trashed (though at times this is a good description of our home), but because we have a number of pets. At present we have 2 black labs and 2 indoor cats, not too many in my opinion but it’s pushing the limit for Mark. Actually, if it were up to the kids and me, we’d have more. Perhaps a bird, a guinea pig, a rabbit would be nice and whatever else might be on sale at the local pet store.

Animals bring me peace. I can walk into a pet store or an animal shelter and immediately have a calming in my spirit, as if my weary soul is being touched by God’s healing hand.

We’re all wired differently. The other day some friends were over to watch a game. I had put the dogs outside for the first half of the game. It was getting dark and late so I asked our guests it would bother them if I let the dogs inside. One immediately perked up and excitedly talked about how the loved animals. Another was fine with it but I could tell he’d prefer not to have them around.

Different things give people peace and help us to detox from the stress of life. It may be nature, animals, alone time, books, time with friends, etc. It’s important to know what it is that calms us and make a point not to neglect it.

However, as with most things, too much of it may have negative consequences. I love our pets but if I were to add another one to our household, it would be too much. We lack the space for it, my time would be divided and what once gave me peace could become another source of stress.

Where do you find your peace? Are you consciously making time to find and experience it? When engage in the activities and spend time with ones who put us in a peaceful state we’re able to hear better God’s whispers. And above all, when we engage with God, we’re able to find peace in chaos. Nothing is better than that!

I’m always in search of new ways to obtain peace. What brings peace to your life?

I feel as if I’ve been in an exhaustive state the past year. I’ve been desiring to move forward fulfill my purpose in life; be a better wife and mother, help others and allow God to use me in the lives of others. But, I’m not exactly sure how to do that or where Every time I try, I get distracted, run into a hindrance or I’m faced with so many choices that I’m easily overwhelmed in my search of my calling that they paralyze me from moving forward. Instead I move from option to option trying to fulfill it all.

It’s as if I’m on one of those moving sidewalks you see in many large airports but I’m walking in the wrong direction. I see the end of the walkway ahead; my assumed destination but I can’t reach it. I walk faster; try to dodge the obstacles that are coming my way. No luck. I’m running out of energy and the only remaining choice I see is to stand still, allow the belt to bring me back to my point of origin, step out of the way and figure out the best plan. To be honest, that seems a bit embarrassing because I’m then admitting to all those watching that I have no idea what I’m to be doing.

In a world full of women and men who seem to be able to do it all, it gets old being the one who never seems to be able to keep it together. However, part of me feels I’m not alone.

So here I am. As I write I’m on the moving sidewalk and it’s riding me backwards. Some may look at me, think I’m playing a game and trying to look silly. But in reality, I’m tired so I’m stopping and letting God move me back to where He and I can reconvene and I’m hoping He’ll show me what’s the next step.

As I begin this journey, I’m looking for books to inspire, times with God to guide, and for life lessons that can be found everywhere; people, humor, animals, mistakes, nature and probably most of all, children. It may be humbling to have to go backwards in life but I’m trying to see it as a time of growth, not humiliation.

So, instead of riding the rest of the way backwards, I think I’ll turn around and see where I’m going versus focusing on where I’ve been as God is moving me forward. Hopefully now I’m going in the directions He’s leading me.

How about you? Do any of you feel you’ve been walking on a moving sidewalk in the wrong direction? Share with me your stories, lessons learned and any insight you might have.