Russell Media - Laurie

Does God ever feel silent? I’ve often wondered why He speaks in a “still small voice,” especially since we live in a culture full of noise. I guess it’s much the same with my kids. They have an innate ability to tune me out if I yell at them (they obviously inherited this trait from their father) but when I speak quietly to them they are more likely to tune in.

I, on the other hand, have a hard time hearing unless it’s spoken with a raised voice. The background noise surrounding my life often camouflages His quiet Spirit. Then again, maybe it’s not the noise that keeps me from hearing Him speak. Perhaps it’s my busyness.

Many years ago we lived in Germany and rented an old row house. It was narrow but three stories high and had marble stairs that twisted their way to the top. Our youngest, Anastasia, was 2-years-old at the time and these stairs were a nightmare. She followed me everywhere and often slipped on the narrow edge of the winding stairway.

One day we had a friend who was coming for a visit and I was on the third floor cleaning the guest bathroom. Anastasia played in the bedroom while I worked getting everything ready for our friend. The building’s old plumbing was acting up so I used a crystal form of Draino in hopes of loosening the clog in the pipes.

Once I was done with my chores I headed down the stairs with Anastasia tagging along behind me. Whenever she was with me I’d often try to consolidate my chores to limit the running up and down the stairs and thus lessening the chance of her tumbling down them.

So I stopped on the second floor to gather the laundry before heading down to the ground floor. I put the spoon I had been using with the crystal Draino on a ledge above a sink. Instantly I heard a voice in me say, “The spoon is not safe there. Don’t leave it.” But I was in a hurry and ignored it. I’m only going to be here 30 seconds.

Moments later I heard a horrific scream coming from Anastasia. She had placed the spoon in her mouth and the crystals that had been stuck to the spoon were now eating away the lining of her mouth. Luckily we were in a bathroom and I immediately began rinsing out her mouth but it was still instantly deformed with swollen lips and tongue.

Next came the E.R., endoscopy and an overnight stay in the pediatric ICU. I cuddled with her and looked at all of the tubes coming out of her little body and had the nerve to ask God, “Why didn’t you warn me?!”

It was then I remembered that He had. He was the voice inside of me telling me clearly the spoon was not safe on the ledge but I was to busy working to clean my house so our guest would be impressed (surely not with my parenting skills).

We were blessed in that Anastasia’s esophagus was only minimally burned and the greater burns in her mouth healed quickly but the memories of that accident are scarred in my heart.

It wasn’t the constant chatter of a 2-year-old that prevented me from hearing God that day – it was the busyness and my need to impress a friend. I was more concerned with hearing the applause of man instead of listening to a warning from God.

I learned my lesson but it was at my daughter’s expense. God may at times speak quietly but it’s always clear.

Does the drive to impress others ever drown out your ability to hear God?

How do you decipher His voice?