Russell Media - Laurie

Our house was a bit crazy the past couple of weeks. Actually, stressful is a better word to describe it. Everyone was in an eternal irritable state – even the dogs. The kids were fighting, Mark and I were barking and the dogs – well they seemed irked over the lack of a walk and went in the backyard and chewed up part of the playset! (Oh yeah, mama wasn’t happy!)

I made numerous attempts to end it – I put the kids to bed earlier, slipped the dogs some extra treats and made heartier meals to keep Mark from being hungry – but the irritation continued. I couldn’t put my finger on it. Why were we all lacking peace?

One day, my 8-year-old daughter and I were in the car when she snapped at me about something I did that bothered her (I think yawned – it was pretty annoying.) I was seconds from reverting to my elementary days and saying something sarcastically about her mother (when I realized I’d be talking about myself!) when God whispered something to me, Talk to her about the way she’s feeling.

Hmm…hadn’t thought of doing that! We talked about it briefly but didn’t reach a conclusion. Then out of the blue she asked me, “Can we go on a date together soon?” Ahhh…that was it – it had been a while since we had spent any one-on-one time together.

The next night she and I went out to dinner and had a wonderful time. We sat on the same side of the booth and she cuddled into me like a little girl. We played the games on the children’s menu and talked about school. It was a simple night but I had my sweet girl back. Yesterday Mark took Noah night skiing and I took the dogs for a long walk. This morning, life felt good again. It was peaceful.

As I sat thinking about it this morning, I realized it is the same with God. When I neglect having one-on-one time with him – the peace in my heart flees. Having time to quiet my heart, focus and be with God not only fills me with peace – it energizes me and enables me to handle better the stress of the day. It is in these moments that his Spirit guides and restores me. It allows me love on Him and Him on me. It is then I find the peace that transform all understanding.

What do you do when you feel a lack of peace with God?

The other day I was looking through old picture books with my kids. My son’s favorite is one a preschool teacher gave him about Loggerhead sea turtles. It’s a sweet story that follows the life of a baby sea turtle into adulthood. They wanted to hear it again, so we cuddled on the couch and read it for “old times” sake. However, this time I noticed a piece of wisdom in the story that I’d missed before.

The mother Loggerhead builds a nest in the sand, lays her eggs and heads back out to sea. Weeks later, the baby turtles crack through their eggs. However, many hungry eyes are watching and waiting. The babies’ shells are soft and make them an easy meal. Many sea gulls and crabs hide in the wings waiting for them the turtles to make their journey toward the sea. So the babies wait until nighttime in hopes of using the dark to camouflage them.

It was the next part of the story that got me thinking. The babies have no parents to lead them into the water but God provided them with a landmark to guide them. The horizon and the moonlight on the sea show the babies the path to safety.

However, there is another danger the babies now face. Lights from the street and buildings along the beach confuse some. These artificial lights are brighter and distracting. They draw the attention of a number of the babies and they mistakenly head in the wrong direction, never making it to the sea.

This is a similar struggle we face. God has provided us each personal “landmarks” leading us to safety and a life full of adventure. But there are many distractions the world provides that steal our attention. Before we know it we’re heading in the wrong direction. The lights may be brighter and more alluring but they lead to an environment we were not created for.

My kids grew impatient with me as I pondered this thought. Actually, for a minute they wondered if mommy had fallen asleep with her eyes open as I stared into space. So I began sharing with them what this analogy to which my son asked, “How do you know if you’re following the right light?”

Man – why do they always ask me these hard questions when I’m not prepared? J

I blubbered around with my words for a minute. I don’t remember all that I said but I’m pretty sure it made little sense and was overly complicated. Then my daughter summarized it for us, “Don’t worry…God will let us know if we’re going the wrong way.”

Wow – so simple yet so true.

Her clear message redirected my thoughts. The key is communion with God. While on earth, Jesus prayed continually. He broke away from the group often seeking direction from the Father. It was important that he stay on the path his Father had prepared for him. There were many needs to be met and battles to be fought that could have diverted him from his purpose on earth. He knew he needed God to point out his divine landmarks.

I’ve felt very distracted this summer and as if I’m floundering. There are many “good” things out there yet I wondered if I’m in the process of merging off the path God has for me. It’s time to refocus on communing with God and open my eyes for the divine landmarks God’s giving me.

Are any of you feeling the same or dealing with the same struggles?

I work from home most days. It’s really nice, especially since the lack of a commute saves me time and money. One morning I knew I wasn’t going to see anyone else until late afternoon. The kids were at school, Mark was at the office so I decided to save even more time and go with the “natural” look. I skipped my daily routine of putting on make-up. In a hurry to take advantage of my extra time, I jumped right into work.

About an hour after I started, the doorbell rang. I peeked out the window and saw it was our delivery guy in search of a signature. When I opened the door he looked at me and seemed thrown off a bit, “Oh, you’re home. I sure hope I didn’t wake you.”

Hmmm…why did he say that? I didn’t delay in answering the door. It was almost 10:00 a.m. on a weekday. Why would he think I’d still be in bed?

As I returned to my desk, I glanced at my reflection in the mirror. I stopped. I knew. My face, which is normally covered with beauty products, was completely bare. My imperfections glared. My eyes seemed smaller, my nose looked bigger and my hair was definitely nappier. I looked more like a woman fresh out of bed rather than one fresh for the day.

The rest of the morning was spent with me obsessing over my lack of “natural” beauty.

I have a love/hate relationship with beauty. The old saying tells us that “beauty is in the eyes of the beholder,” but if this is true, why do I feel enslaved to it? Maybe it’s our present definition of it. Why do I feel the need for my body to be a certain size and my hair to not be a certain color? Why is it that I can I find beauty on the TV but not in the mirror? Something is wrong.

Perhaps part of the problem is our culture’s misconstrued definition of beauty. Dictionaries define beauty as something that that brings great pleasure to the senses or blesses the mind. I like this – it’s quite nice. According to this definition, beauty can be found basically anywhere. But if my skin is not a certain color or my jeans a particular size, I feel ugly.

I did an informal word search in a Bible program on the words “beauty” and “beautiful.” There I noticed two things. With the exception of the books of Esther and Song of Solomon, these two words were generally used to describe God or part of his creation and the other warned us of the dangers of depending on our own beauty or man-made beauty.

Again, this was an informal study but it appears that God knew that our obsession for beauty would take our eyes off of Him and what He has given us, and then place it on ourselves. We like beauty. We want it and will do what it takes to have it. In the process we lose sweet communion with God.

I personally don’t see harm in trying to improve my appearance but when it causes my focus to leave God and then fixate it on myself, I’m in insecure territory. I see all that I’m not. However, when my eyes are on God and all who He is, I see all that I am in Him. I see true beauty – one that blesses the mind and brings true pleasure. I’m filled with peace instead of anxiety. And to me, that sounds beautiful.

For now, I’ll continue to wear make-up most days but I’m won’t worry if others do a double take and wonder if I’ve been sick due to my small eyes. I may never see the natural color of my hair again. Come to think of it, I’m not sure if I actually remember it. Either way, when the gray makes its way through I’ll see it as a reminder that God has given me some great years and memories…and hopefully some wisdom learned along the way.

How about you? Does our culture’s definition of beauty haunt you? Any insight on how you deal with it? How are raising your children to deal with it?